Some random ponderings lately . . .
--When I'm back in Lincoln it feels like home. When I'm here it's fine and all, but going back has the feeling of belonging. When we head back to visit I can't wait to get there. When I'm going about my Lincoln errands I love how I don't have to think, how I know where to go, the fastest way to get there. I love the familiarity and how it just feels right. When we leave I am sad. It has made me think about living on this earth and how as a Christian my true home is in Heaven. Do I long for Heaven the way I long for Lincoln . . . ? Do I feel a bit out of place on earth because I don't really belong here? Or do I love my earthen life a bit too much?
--I'm reading a historical fiction retelling of Martha Washington's life (link). She frequently comments of George's self-control, that he was a "master of himself" in a way that he was never given to excess. What a high compliment to come from one's spouse! George Washington as a whole is quite a fascinating man, somebody who didn't quite ever want the duties thrust upon him but took them up because it was in the best course of action for a new country.
--Similarly, I've been thinking about 1 Timothy 4:8 "for bodily discipline is only of little profit, but godliness is profitable for all things . . ." There are days I don't want to run, but I make myself do it (usually . . .) and I'm always so happy (when I'm finished of course!) to have disciplined myself to get the job done. Sometimes I think it is so much easier to discipline ourselves to accomplish things on the outside, while inwardly, those disciplines that are profitable for ALL things are such a daily battle. Why do I struggle so much when it comes to being more patient with my kids, speaking words that are edifying? Why can't I set my mind to accomplishing those goals in the same way I set my mind to getting a run in?
--Finally "getting" the whole concept of the importance of recognizing the gospel's importance in our day-to-day lives. It's not just something that saves us once, but gives us the power daily to "stop it." Whatever sin we know we keep committing we can stop because of the gospel--every day is a good day for repentance. I never quite understood what it meant to "preach the gospel to myself daily" but kind of had a light bulb moment this past weekend.
--Lately, I've been able to write several "answereds" in my little prayer journal. Even though God is sovereign and will do what He intends to do, what an incredible blessing prayer is and the fact He lets me experience the joy of feeling I had a small part in the answer.
pretending and getting real
3 months ago